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How Do You Support Your Spouse?

Betty (@its_me_betty), today's guest post author, is a wife of a blogger, mother of one son, and has a little fat beagle named Fred. She enjoys helping her husband promote his blog, TheJoeReview. Every Saturday he posts one of my recipes on his blog & also writes about tech & brew reviews.


As little girls I am sure we all dreamed that one day we would marry our clichéd “knight in shining armor,” ride off into the sunset, and live happily ever after. We believed that nothing would go wrong and our lives would mirror a fairy tale. This is the way I saw it at least. Well, I got part of it at right. I married my knight in shining armor, however; life wasn’t as problem-free as I had anticipated. My husband and I have had many obstacles and challenges to deal with.

The most challenging obstacle we faced was when we were expecting our son. I became very ill and we almost didn't make it. My husband stuck by me through the whole ordeal and when I was shipped to a different state because, at that time, there were no rooms at the NICU in our local hospital, he made it a point to go up and see me every weekend. I am sure he was just as scared as I was, but you could never tell; he was my rock through the whole ordeal. I broke down several times and was very devastated to learn that I might not get to know my son. But my husband kept me grounded. I am eternally grateful.

Kissing Fools (Weekly Assignment)

One of the most important lessons Joe and I have learned is to be there for each other and support each other—to be each other’s fan club. There are in fact times when we don't see eye to eye; but I can always count on him being the one person I can rely on no matter what. The lines of communication need to be kept open. Listen to each other, be honest with each other and don't be ashamed to admit when you’re wrong.

Remember to make time for each other and to make each other feel special. It's just like a hobby—the more time you put into it, the better you get at it. It goes both ways; you can't expect one person to do all the work and put in all the effort. I'm sure you've heard that saying, "Treat others as you would like to be treated," this also applies to your marriage. Don't be embarrassed or ashamed to show each other you love each other and that you still get butterflies when they're around or when they kiss or hug you, it’s little things like that, that go a long way.

With all the things we are faced with these days, our marriage is one thing that we need to work on keeping strong. Together everything and anything is possible.

photo credit FairyWren

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29 comments:

MudslideMama said...

What a wonderful, personal post. Thank you for sharing.

Jenn said...

Betty, thank you for sharing such a personal and well written story. You sure have some great advice for couples.

Fashiongrail said...

What a sweet post! I couldn't agree with you more!

Tamara said...

Betty it is so refreshing to hear a women praising and saying nice things about her husband.

I think it is fantastic that you help Joe with his blog thejoereview. I started all this internet stuff and website designing to help my husband. It's nice to have a common interest.

And your beautiful son. I know what a traumatic experience that had to have been. I think I may have told you but I was a nurse in the NICU for many years. The painful memories of that time in the hospital will be stories you tell your son in the future.

Keep writing more stories like this. You will enspire others.

Tamara

Lisa S said...

Betty,
I still think you should start your own blog. You are an amazing woman! Keep on loving - you two have it all figured out.
Lisa

Mrs. Bubba said...

I love this post, thanks for sharing! I think being each other's loudest cheerleaders also keeps motivating through the tough times. The little things are essential as well as open honest communication. You summed it all up very nicely.

sassypackrat said...

Great post! As a twitter friend I kind of know you but this has helped me learn more about you, made you more real. I'm so glad you had such caring and loving support as you were going thru such a scary and difficult time. Lucky you for finding such a great husband! And lucky hime for finding such a supportive wife!

Tara Burner said...

As you already know I blogged about appreciating relationships earlier at http://onethingyoucando.com/misc/appreciate-relationships.php and while I'm happily single I see so many couples that don't appreciate one or the other...your story defies that and shows there are still loving compassionate couples! Thank you!

Scriber's Web said...

Betty,

I am a huge fan of Joe but I am also a huge fan of you:) I mean who picks beer over wine? LOL. So most guys including my family pick beer. Let's banish them to an Island!

Love the post. You really know how to express your emotions in words.

I had no idea that you went through a tough pregnancy. So happy that everything worked out.

Great post. You need to do a page on Joe's site.

Love Joe's site. You both make an awesome team!

:)

Cindy O said...

Betty, Thank you for sharing your personal story. I strongly believe in working together as a couple..together we can conquer all our obstacles. I too, had a very similar experience with my last son's birth--so your post brings back all those memories.
Nice to see a couple..still holding on tight together--like you and & Joe.

TammyDantzler said...

Betty, so you say you can't cook or write ... HA HA, however you always find ways to add value and touch peoples lives with your caring personality and unique style of sharing. Together as one you and Joe can conquer the world making your fairy tale everlasting and Jess's future brighter. Much love my friend and god bless you and yours. Tammy

Vicki said...

Betty~
Thanks for sharing your love story. Your loving relationship is the sweetest gift you can give to your son. Blessings to you, your family, and "my" Fred!

Adonya Wong said...

The lovey dovey love story of Betty & Joe! LOVE IT!!!!

Thanks so much for sharing your story with us!

Adonya

MommaYoung said...

Betty this is a wonderful article. You really state the importance of being a couple. It takes work, patience and much love.

Thank you so much for sharing...

Erin said...

Even though I know how great you are, and how great Joe is, and how much you love eachother... hehe This post is still so wonderful! You both are wonderful! and the greatest parents!

And I know you don't have a lot of time, but I agree, you should start your own blog. Even just a basic one to update how your week went :)

<3 ya!

Sonja Cassella said...

Betty, that is a lovely thought about supporting and sharing and making time for eachother. Sometimes it seems that we never know what we have until hardships come. I am going to send it to my husband I know he will find it touching too.

Sonja

Joe said...

This post definitely proves my point, that you should start your own blog. You have a voice and view that people can connect with. You know I'll support you in anything you do! Go for it, Babe!

Your Loving Husband,

Joe

delaney55 said...

Betty
I agree with Joe, I think you would do great with your own blog since this post was excellent! You rock!

Delaney

Judi said...

Betty, you are my inspiration. What a great post -- so grounded, so unpretentious, so genuine. The best writing comes from the heart, not a degree or a pedigree. I don't even know you but I feel such a special connection with you via social networking. It's strange but comfortable and comforting. Thanks for sharing.

Janine said...

I agree with everyone else who has mentioned it---you need to be writing (blogging)!!

I know it's hard sometimes when you think about the prospect of putting yourself out there for the world to see (read). But, your style of writing is the kind that restores faith and people out here need more of that.

I'm still holding out for my Knight...even more so now, after reading this post :)

xo

Betty said...

I want to thank everyone for your kind words and your friendship. I have had a blast meeting all you wonderful ladies. And I want to thank the ladies of Mom It Forward, I had fun putting this post together. :)

Laura-Whateverebay said...

Betty - what a wonderful post and inspiring story. Open communication is always critical. You both are fortunate to have the Recipe for Love (my fave song - Harry Connick Jr. )

- Laura

bloggingexperiments said...

Betty:

This is an excellent post! I was very touched by your story about your son, and can totally relate to it. How wonderful that Joe was there for you. Have have been lucky enough to see your relationship through Joe's blog for the past several months, and I knew it was something special.

Great post...and you should start your own blog! :)

Maureen Lee said...

Well, it's unanimous, Betty - the world needs to hear your voice again, in the form of a blog! Thank you for being so open and honest, and having the willingness to be vulnerable, as well.

I agree with Judi: "The best writing comes from the heart," and this post was beautifully written. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us!

meleah rebeccah said...

First of all, we need MORE POSTS by Betty! She rules.

This was a BEAUTIFULLY written story!

Julianne said...

I totally agree with you on being each other's biggest fan club. I try to be my husband's #1 cheerleader as often as I can. I loved yor guest article. It's sweet and honest. And very true!! :-)

And I agree with Joe. You need your own blog! :-)

Danielle said...

Oh Betty...Woooo-Hooooo
This first post is fabulous!!!
What a lovely concept in this very difficult time we are in....love each other and "be each other’s fan club!"
I didnt know you had gone thru quite so much with the birth of your precious son. Im so glad to hear that you had so much support and love!
Thank you for sharing such a touching story and also for the comments about how we can support one another in marriage!!! :)

Mary Lutz said...

I just met Betty on Twitter. This is an amazing story and awesome advice! Keep writing Betty and start your own blog! LOL!

Billie said...

Great post, Betty! It's wonderful how you and your husband have a strong connection to each other. Marriage can be difficult at times, but like you say, communication and honesty is so important. Thank you for such a refreshing article.